Educational Experiences
by mirroredsakura
Summary: Gen. First Kyouyacentric, mostly Haruhicentric. Collection of shorts for ourancontest on LJ.
1. A Force of Nature

**Title:** A Force of Nature  
**Author:** **mirroredsakura**  
**Fandom:** Ouran High School Host Club  
**Rating:** G  
**Pairings/Characters:** none / Kyouya, Tamaki, Tamaki  
**ourancontest** **Drabble Theme:** #3 Kyouya Ohtori  
**Warnings:** none

**Summary:** Alas, it seems Tamaki will never learn... set sometime after ep. 17.

**Disclaimers:** Not mine, else I'd have the twins in my lap and not on my screen.

**Notes:** Though they fall under the drabble section of the challenge comm contests, I call them shorts. They're not long enough to be ficlets, too long to be real drabbles, and so shorts they are. They come in no particular order, but as I'm a freak about stuff going in order, I'll let them go by challenge number. Just be prepared to bounce around. Enjoy!

~+~+~+~

Kyouya was awake.

It was six in the morning.

Someone was going to die.

He had slipped off his glasses and flopped back against his pillow with a contented sigh all of an _hour_ ago. The goings on of the outside world could afford to go unrecorded for all of a few hours, couldn't it?

"_KYOOOOOUUUUYYYAAAA!_"

Evidently not.

"_What do you want?_" he snarled, feeling the wash of anger grow into a near-tangible fog of violet mist and crackling lightning around him as he sat up to face the trespassers. There needed to be a lock on his door and there needed to be a lock on his door _soon_.

The last time this had happened there had been _five_ of them, all crowding around his bed and making a racket. From the sound of it, this time it was only Tamaki. Good. He could handle it just being Tamaki.

And send him whimpering and sobbing into a corner begging for forgiveness.

Satisfied with this assessment, he opened his eyes.

He focused on brown hair.

He paused.

Tamaki did not have brown hair.

…Haruhi then.

It would explain having not-heard her, as she could sometimes tell when it was detrimental to her health to speak, unlike a certain blond idiot. It certainly did not explain why she was in his room.

"Get up, Kyouya, we're going to be _late!_"

There was Tamaki all right. And from the look of things, he was dancing from one foot to the other in a fit of impatience.

"_What are you talking about?_"

Haruhi looked ready to throw cautions to the wind and bolt out of the room—a wise maneuver that Tamaki easily prevented by keeping a firm grip on the rookie's collar.

"It's a… secret! Up! Up!"

The man seemed to have forgotten all too easily what happened when you didn't let sleeping Ohtoris lie. Kyouya turned to the closest semblance of sanity that was also still sentient.

"And why are you here?"

She grimaced and edged a few steps backward. "…The others said 'once was enough'." She turned away and he just hear the mumbled, "_I can see why_."

So even the twins could remember the Wrath Of A Sleeping Kyouya. Clearly Tamaki required a second reminder.

He opened his mouth, gathering the words of utter _rage_ and _contempt_…

…and then came to the conclusion that it was entirely too much effort for such an ungodly hour of the morning. He would deal with the man later. He plopped back onto his pillow and shut his eyes, determined to ignore the insistent wail in his ear.

His hand _did_ tighten on his cell phone and wallet that he now kept on his person at all times when he felt the blond pounce on him a moment later, however.

There were some things you just couldn't fight.

A Tamaki in the throes of his commoner addiction/fascination was one of them.

Sqoose. It's early in the morning, and I have not slept at all last night.

~+~+~+~

...Clearly this means I should write something, but as I'm on my desktop for the first time in a long time, I don't have the bits of other fic that I've been working on. And thus I write new stuff. And finish it. Yippee. =_= *plops over*


	2. Countdown

**Title:** Countdown  
**Author:** **mirroredsakura**  
**Fandom:** Ouran High School Host Club  
**Rating:** G  
**Pairings/Characters:** none, Haruhi  
**ourancontest** **Drabble Theme:** #4, Blunder  
**Warnings:** none

**Summary:** If Haruhi thinks on it... sometimes it doesn't seem all that bad...

**Disclaimers:** Not mine. But hell if I didn't wish it was.

334354564 yen left to go.

~+~+~+~

Haruhi sometimes thought that smashing an enormous 800 million yen vase was the biggest blunder she had ever committed in all the sixteen years of her life.

This far surpassed the accidental dumping of a boy she did not realize she'd dumped, her seeming inability to know when she was doing something wrong… and even that incident with the bunch of bananas, but that was a story she'd vowed never to retell, not even to herself.

Those were usually the times when Tamaki-sempai was waving a bunny suit in her face, or the twins were busy running around with a cursed Belzenef doll or when Kyouya-sempai opened his mouth.

Bad things tended to happen when Kyouya opened his mouth. Like additional debt and impossible bets and lots of blaming. Not that he didn't have a very nice mouth, but that was far and beyond the point.

…Or perhaps it was the point.

Because Tamaki-sempai had a nice mouth too. It was hard not to notice it, he used it too often to ignore. The same could be said about Kaoru and Hikaru, usually in unison. She was hard-pressed not to notice Honey-sempai's mouth since it was always full of something and besides, she had a moral obligation to glance suspiciously at him from time to time to see if he came down with cavities from all that cake. And as for Mori-sempai… well. There was a smile there somewhere, and it didn't appear often. You _had_ to watch for it.

It was when she noticed these things—them, not just their mouths—that she thought maybe, _maybe_ selling herself to slavery and joining the Host Club might also have been one of the best things that'd ever happened to her.

And the twins sailed in.

"Haruhi, Haruhi, _Haruhiiiiii!_ We need more coffee! Go get some!"

This was coupled with a firm shove out the door.

…_Then again_, she thought grumpily as they promptly shut the door behind her, _maybe not._

334354486 yen to go.

~+~+~+~

God I'm tired. Busy night, but I saw the challenge and decided I had to write something for it, whether or not I was up to thinking of anything for it or not. Bedtime for sleepy Stephs.


	3. Dress Up

**Title:** Dress Up  
**Author:** **mirroredsakura**  
**Fandom:** Ouran High School Host Club  
**Rating:** G  
**Pairing/Characters:** none, Haruhi  
**ourancontest** **Drabble Theme:** #5, Colours (cancelled)  
**Warnings:** none

**Summary:** When beautiful men try to become beautiful women, it HURTS HARUHI'S BRAIN.

**Disclaimers:** Not mine.

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Tamaki-sempai looked hideous.

Normally Haruhi didn't pay overmuch attention to Tamaki-sempai's face—unless his mouth was open, and even then she tended to ignore much of what came out of it—but today it was covered in makeup.

Not even _good_ makeup—though Haruhi couldn't exactly stand up and call herself the authority on the subject, she left that to her father and perhaps the twins—it was _clown_ makeup. Or at least that was the impression she got whenever she managed to look at him full in the face.

Violet was smeared in generous amounts from his eyelids to the curve of his brows, and he'd lined his eyes with thick dark kohl, finishing it off with black mascara—or those lashes could have been fake, Haruhi was sure he'd flutter them more when in regular uniform if they were really his. As if that wasn't enough, he'd dabbed on twin circles of blush and topped it all off with hastily-applied lipstick, that covered his lips and more—if those marks on his teeth were anything to go by.

Haruhi's strange desire to burst into laughter—something she didn't do very often, mind you—was superseded only by the even stronger desire to run away. This was a defence mechanism, you see. It had been honed by a little more than a year's worth of past experiences whenever she got a _very bad feeling_.

When Honey-sempai pounced on her in a dress, a wig, and with a face only a mother could love, she began backing up towards the door. Only the combined force of the shocked Lobelia girls managed to keep her standing until the moment of _run! Haruhi, run!_ had passed, and sheer dumbstruck _buh?_ took it's place.

And then the rest of the Host Club had decided it was an opportune time to blind her. It was like a rainbow, except a rainbow generally stays in one place. This one was flounced, shirred, beribboned, and moved like only a host of evidently colorblind men could.

She did the only thing she could do.

She burst out laughing.


	4. Act of Bravery

**Title:** Acts of Bravery  
**Author:** **mirroredsakura**  
**Fandom:** Ouran High School Host Club  
**Rating:** G  
**ourancontest** **Challenge:** #6, Food  
**Warnings:** none

**Summary:** Tamaki tries his hand at making dessert. The world trembles.

**Notes:** Figures the only time I can write fic is when I have no time. At school. In a hurry. *sighs*

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Haruhi stared at the thing on her plate.

The strange glutinous mass stared back. With hearts for eyes. Bright red ones. She didn't even want to contemplate the steadily-dripping splotch that was probably supposed to have been a pair of puckered lips.

"…Tamaki-sempai… what is this?"

The blond looked utterly crestfallen, and as she watched, the tears began to pool beatifically at the corners of his eyes. "You… you don't like it? Haruhi?"

She eyed the other Host Club members dubiously. They didn't look back, as they all seemed rather preoccupied staring at their own dishes of bizarrely-decorated… well, whatever it was. "I might tell you more if you'd tell me what it's supposed to be…" she poked at cautiously with a fingertip. It wriggled at her.

"It's a pudding!" Tamaki declared, smiling brilliantly, dancing from one foot in the other in his glee. "I made it myself!"

The twins stared at him with identical expressions of absolute horror. Honey-sempai started to cry. She was certain she saw Mori-sempai shiver as he patted Honey-sempai on the head. Kyouya-sempai's glasses reflected entirely too much light to see his expression, but she was sure she saw his lips tightening as he stared at his own wriggling lump.

She turned back to staring at it. Its 'mouth' had dribbled down completely onto the plate, and it looked rather sad and melancholy-looking (or as sad as a pudding can look with hearts for eyes) as its eyes slowly began to follow its mouth and dribble down one lumpy side.

Tamaki was watching her with those _eyes_ again. The ones that were way too shiny for comfort. Hopeful eyes.

With a deep breath, she picked up her fork. The others were watching now, and the twins were wearing identical looks of awe for even attempting such a thing. She speared a piece off the side. It jiggled. She tried to ignore it and put it in her mouth.

Nothing; a hint of something sweet. Not that bad, considering Tamaki had only recently been asking her which end of a kettle you were supposed to plug in.

He was beaming with pride. "SEE!" he declared triumphantly to the others. "HARUHI LIKES IT!"

And then…

Oh god, fire, fire, burning, water, need water, so much water, tea, tea will do, _need tea!_

Even as she jerked the teacup off the table and drank it down in gulps, and the others, noting this, quickly disposed of their own puddings in… unusual ways—Haruhi would have to remind Hikaru later that goldfish do _not_ eat indigestible lumps of cayenne-pepper pudding—as she quickly snatched up the teapot and began mechanically refilling her teacup. Oh the burning!

"Well? Well?" Tamaki had been staring hopefully at her all this time, blind to the fact that flames were spurting out of her mouth.

"Fine," she rasped hoarsely, "Just fine."

The others echoed her in tones of bright agreement and congratulations.

…Sometimes it was enough just to make their King smile like that.

~+~+~+~

And done. Yippety skip! OMFG ICONTEST TIME *zoom*


End file.
